Thursday, April 19, 2012

Love Stinks

Anyone that knows me personally knows that my love life has been on the rocks as of late. I always feel the need to shield any embarrassing issues from the public, but Kyle and his violent and rash temper have unfortunately not allowed me to do that completely. So I am going to go ahead and get it all out in the open--for the most part. I will leave out the details out of respect.

As everyone who knows me is aware, I can sometimes be sarcastic. I have been this way for most of my life, and certainly for the entire time Kyle has known me. When Kyle left New York this last time he changed. He has always had anger issues and a bad temper, but it got worse. He said and did things that were even worse than things I had already known him to say and do when he was angry. He demanded to live in Albany, even though my career and my child's education would suffer. He has no career. All the same, I made a sacrifice because I was dedicated to making the relationship work, and he showed no sign of budging on his decision. Once in Albany his temper got even worse. I became afraid of him and afraid of what he might do. I assure you my fear was not unjust. I loved him, but my child and my safety will always come first. I gave countless chances and offered all the help that I was able to give. The situation only grew worse, and he denied responsibility for any of it. The blame was always placed on my smart mouth. No mouth deserves the things he has done. No child deserves to see and hear the things he forced my child to see and hear. Bruises heal, but memories of nightmares don't fade as easily. I gave up. It was all that was left to do. I am not superwoman and am not in need of added stress and fear in my life or the life of my child. His rage and irrational behavior was made public when he posted inappropriate pictures and comments to get back at me for not doing things that he wanted me to do. He embarrassed me in front of my family and friends, and he forced my child to see things that he cannot unsee. I hope that Kyle gets the help he needs, and I hope he turns his life around. If you are a praying person then Kyle is someone in need of prayers. I cannot help him anymore.

1 comment:

  1. Sandra, I'm really sorry you're going through all of this. I know I haven't seen you in years but I still think a lot of you. I hate that you're back in that shithole place - Albany was the setting of the worst years of my life. I'm in Huntsville, so pack a bag, grab the kid, and come up for a weekend. There are so many great things to do around here and I'm pretty sure you could use the break. Also, Garrett is close and he'd love to see you. Message me and be like Nike and just do it.